How to cope with grief and loss over the holidays
For those facing the holidays without a loved one, Hospice Care offers advice on how to cope.
Take care of yourself.
You are of little value to your family and friends if you are not well rested and taking care of yourself first and foremost.
Find a way to acknowledge the person you have lost.
Rather than avoiding the feelings, find a way to remember and acknowledge the person that is meaningful and positive.
Incorporate memories or stories about the person into your family traditions.
Remember your friend or family member’s role in holiday traditions and share those memories.
Find new traditions that honor those who are no longer here.
Consider incorporating a new tradition such as a special decoration or moment of reflection in memory of the person who has died.
Plan ahead.
Think ahead about what events will be especially emotional for you this holiday season and evaluate what will best ease that pain whether it be surrounding yourself with family or excusing yourself for a private moment.
Take one day at a time.
Focus on today and the experience at hand.
Don’t be afraid to make changes.
Sometimes old traditions or routines can be too painful without important people present. Try something new this holiday season. Consider going somewhere different or changing your traditional holiday menu.
Do what you can.
Do only what is special and meaningful to you this year. Be brave enough to say no, and be realistic enough to cancel plans when you change your mind.
Ask for help.
Ask for and accept offers of concrete assistance with holiday chores like decorating, shopping, cooking or cleaning. Look for ways to involve other people in your holiday planning.
Speak to someone outside the family.
Organizations such as Hospice Care Inc. in southern Wisconsin are ready to be of assistance: Call (608) 276-4660 in Madison or (608) 755-1871 in Janesville, or visit www.hospicecareinc.com.
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